Friday, 8 January 2010

Not too old to scale fences

I learnt tonight that I am not too old to scale fences.

After a convivial evening with friends, who also happen to be neighbours, I decide to call it a night. We have been out to dinner down the street, and finished up in Thelma's house, which happens to be next door to mine. Thelma also happens to have my spare key. THANK GOD.

I enter my house and remember that I have something on the clothes line outside. A second, a mere second, after I close my back door behind me, I realise that I have forgotten to snib it open. Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. Don't panic.

This is the first time I have ever locked myself outside. Many times I have wondered what I would do, never considering that it would be 10:30 at night, when all around is dark and quiet. I ghost into my garage to see whether I can open my garage door from the inside. But it is dark, and I have never opened it from the inside before and don't know how. Besides, I know there are spiders camped out on the back of the door. I've seen them!

But one thing I do know, people are still up next door. There is a small fence between our units, and I know that it is possible to climb up and talk to people in the garden on the other side. But it is 10:30 at night, and they are in the front of the house. Will they hear me if I call out? Somewhat panicked and not entirely sober, I decide to scale the fence. It doesn't take very long. In a few seconds I am in the garden next door.

Out comes Thelma to meet me. She looks perplexed. It is not until I enter her house that I realise the pandemonium I have caused. Sally is mopping up spilt milk, knocked over by Dave who was trying to back up Thelma as they confronted the so-called burglar thumping over the side fence.

We are in hysterics for about 15 minutes solid. Thelma feeds me wine, and then cognac. Over an hour later, I am less sober than I was before! But eventually Thelma escorts me home with my spare key and I am inside again. What a night!


  1. How funny. I am a serial 'locker - outer' and (strangley) none of my neighbours have my keys! that's something I keep meaning to do!

  2. I always fear doing this. I can imagine your neighbours' wory! lol. Good story. Makes me think that I must give out a key to someone else too!