I've been doing a lot of thinking about writing recently. I've been thinking about when I'm going to write, where I'm going to write and what I'm going to write.
In reality, I'm not so worried about the 'when'. I might not be in a good habit now, but I know that once I put my mind to it I can find that 1 hour (or more) in every day that is required to keep surging forward. All this requires is discipline from me, and when I want to be writing there's nothing that will hold me back from that.
So where has my 'want' gone? Part of the problem, I'm convinced, is in where I write. I live in a small unit with too much stuff, and the room that gets used as a dumping ground is my study. Over and over again I clear it out, and then it fills up again with junk - empty wine boxes, bags for the op shop, gifts I don't know what to do with, objects I do actually want but haven't gotten around to installing yet. There's so much clutter in there (here) that I start avoiding the room. In desperation I've tried using my computer in the living room -- or in bed -- but I really do prefer to be sitting at a desk.
And then there's the whole being 'at home' aspect. Home, where there's not only the study to declutter, but housework to be done, cupboards to sort, a garden to tame . . . This is why going down to Phillip Island for writing retreats has been such a godsend. Aside from a brief cleanup before departure, there are no distractions and no clutter! For the past year or maybe two, it feels as though the only times I've actually achieved anything substantial has been on those weekends.
I've had discussions with various members of my writing group about writing spaces recently, and a few have started escaping to libraries to simply get some writing done. Maybe this is something I also need to explore.
The other big question is what to write. Right now I'm wrestling with the choice between having faith in the novel I've been working on for years now, and starting something completely new. Realistically, the chance of novel #1 actually being good enough for publication is negligible -- statistically because it's the first novel I've written, but also because I know I've been patching up novice errors for years now. There's a strong argument for stuffing it into the bottom drawer and getting onto something that has strong foundations, that is fresh, that is exciting.
And every time I think I've actually convinced myself it's time to lay #1 aside, I think of my characters who I'm not ready to leave, and the monumental task of fantasy worldbuilding that I would be faced with . . .
Still wrestling. And not writing.